From: gary@wb9rxw.lonestar.org (Gary Partain)
Subject: Brain Damage Quiz
Date: 30 Dec 91 11:30:04 GMT
This little ditty was given to me by an old girlfriend when I was in
college. I have no idea where it came from, or who originally wrote it.
One hint: This makes a whole lot more sense if you drink heavily before
reading it.
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Brain Damage Quiz
Following is a quiz. Please answer all questions honestly, and to the best
of your ability, or your answers may not be honest, or to the best of your
ability.
1. t/f People tell me one thing one day and out the other.
2. t/f I can't unclasp my hands.
3. t/f I can wear my shirts as pants.
4. t/f I feel as much like I did yesterday as I do today.
5. t/f At parties, I like to sit by myself and collect a great deal
of saliva.
6. t/f I often mistake my hands for food.
7. t/f I'd rather eat soap than little stones.
8. t/f I never liked room temperature.
9. t/f I line my pockets with hot cheese.
10. t/f My throat is closer than it seems.
11. t/f I am annoyed by the taste of my teeth.
12. t/f Sometimes I feel compelled to count the freckles on my arms
over and over until I lose control of my bladder.
13. t/f Most things are better eaten than forgotten.
14. t/f Likes and dislikes are among my favorites.
15. t/f My patio is covered with killer frost.
16. t/f I've lost all sensation in my shirt.
17. t/f I try to swallow at least three times a day.
18. t/f My best friend is a social worker.
19. t/f I've always known when to close my eyes.
20. t/f My squirrels don't know where I am tonight.
21. t/f Little can be said for Luxembourg.
22. t/f No napkin is sanitary enough for me.
23. t/f I walk this way because I have to.
24. t/f Walls impede my progress.
25. t/f I can't find my marmots.
26. t/f I like mechanics magazines, but I would rather fondle a
marine.
27. t/f My uncle is as stupid as paste.
28. t/f I can pet animals by the mouthful.
29. t/f My toes are numbered.
30. t/f Man's reach should exceed his overbite.
31. t/f People tell me I'm deaf.
32. t/f My beaver won't go near the water.
33. t/f I can find my ears, but I have to look for them.
34. t/f I don't like any of my loved ones.
35. t/f Sometimes I have the strange feeling that I've done something
before.
36. t/f Sometimes I have the strange feeling that I've done something
before.
37. t/f A good friend should stick to the ceiling when the going
gets rough.
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