A priest, a Pentecostal preacher and a Rabbi all served as chaplains to the
students of Northern Michigan University in Marquette.
They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk shop.
One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really all
that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear.
One thing led to another and they decided to do an experiment They would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it and attempt to convert it.
Seven days later, they're all together to discuss the experience.
Father Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches, and has
various bandages, goes first. Well, he says, I went into the
woods to find me a bear. And when I found him I began to read to him from
the Catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to
slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy
M ary Mother of God, he became as gentle a lamb. The bishop is coming out
next week to give him first communion and confirmation.
Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with an arm and both
legs in casts, and an IV drip. In his best fire and brimstone oratory he
claimed, WELL brothers, you KNOW that we don't sprinkle! I went out and
I FOUND me a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY
WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and
we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another
until we came to a creek. So I quick DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy
soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the
rest of the day praising Jesus.
They both looked down at the rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He was
in a body cast and traction with IV's and monitors running in and out of
him. He was in bad shape.
The rabbi looks up and says, Looking back on it, circumcision may not have
been the best way to start things out with my bear .
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