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Subject: Give 'Til It Hurts

Dear Kind Stranger,

I am a very sick little boy. My mother is typing this for me, because I

She is crying. Don't cry, Mommy!

Mommy is always sad, but she says it's not my fault. I asked her if it was
God's fault, but she didn't answer, and only started crying harder, so I
don't ask her that anymore.

The reason she is so sad is that I'm so sick. I was born without a body.

It doesn't hurt, except when I go to sleep. The doctors gave me an
artificial body. My body is a burlap bag filled with leaves. The doctors
said that was the best they could do on account of us having no money or
insurance. I would like to have a body transplant, but we need more money.

Mommy doesn't work because she said employers don't hire crying people.

I said, "Don't cry, Mommy," and she hugged my burlap body. Mommy always
gives me hugs, even though she's allergic to burlap, and it chafes her real

I hope you will help me. You can help me if you forward this e-mail. Dr.
Johansen said if you forward this e-mail then Bill Gates will team up with
AOL and do a survey with NASA. Then the astronauts will collect prayers
from school children all over America and take them up to space so that the
angels can hear them better.

Maybe one day I will be able to play baseball. Or maybe just use my lungs
and heart, when the doctors make them.  The doctors said that every time
you forward this letter, the astronauts can take another prayer to the

Please help me. Mommy is so sad, and I want a body. I don't want my leaves
to rot before I turn 10.

If you don't forward this e-mail, that's OK. Mommy says you're a mean
heartless shithead who doesn't care about a poor little boy with only a
head. She says that if you don't stew in the raw pit of your own
guilt-ridden stomach, she hopes you die a long slow horrible death so you
can burn forever in hell. What kind of goddamned person are you that you
can't take five fucking minutes to forward this to all your friends so that
they can feel guilt and shame for the rest of their day, and then maybe
help a poor, bodiless nine-year-old boy?

Please help me. This really sucks. I try to be happy but it's hard.

I wish I had a puppy. I wish I could hold a puppy.

Thank You.
Billy 'Smiles' Evans,
The boy with just a head.
And a burlap sack for a body.

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