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Erlkönig: male-or-female.shtml

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[collected 2002-05-20]


SWISS ARMY KNIFE -- male, because even though it appears useful for a wide 
variety of work, it spends most of its time just opening bottles.

KIDNEYS -- female, because they always go to the bathroom in pairs.

TIRE -- male, because it goes bald and is often over-inflated.

HOT AIR BALLOON: male, because to get it to go anywhere, you have to light 
a fire under it . . . and, of course, there's the hot air part.

SPONGES -- female, because they are soft and squeezable and retain water.

WEB PAGE -- female, because it is always getting hit on.

SHOE -- male, because it is usually unpolished, with its tongue hanging out.

COPIER -- female, because once turned off, it takes a while to warm up -- 
because it is an effective reproductive device when the right buttons are 
pushed -- because it can wreak havoc when the wrong buttons are pushed.

ZIPLOC BAGS -- male, because they hold everything in, but you can always 
see right through them.

SUBWAY -- male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.

HAMMER -- male, because it hasn't evolved much over the last 5,000 years, 
but it's handy to have around.

REMOTE CONTROL -- Definitely female, because it gives men pleasure; he'd be 
lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, 
he keeps trying

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