[2003-09-30]
ONLY IN AMERICA
Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than an
ambulance.
Only in America......are there handicap-parking places in front of a
skating rink.
Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to
the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can
buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large
fries, and a diet coke.
Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the
pens to the counters.
Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in
the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls and
then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't
want to talk to in the first place.
Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in
packages of eight.
Only in America......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the
process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning
'bloodsucking creatures'.
Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille
lettering.
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