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[collected 2004-01-10]

A rich lady from California, who was a tree hugger and a vociferous 
anti-hunter, purchased a piece of timberland. 
There was a large tree on one of the highest points in the tract. She wanted 
to get a good view of the natural splendor of her land so she started to
the big tree. As she neared the top, she encountered a spotted owl that 
attacked her. In her haste to escape, the lady slid down the tree to the 
ground and got many splinters in her crotch. 

In considerable pain, she hurried to the nearest country doctor. She told him 
what an environmentalist and anti-hunter she was and how she came to get 
all the splinters. The doctor listened to her story with great patience and 
then told her to go into the examining room and he would see if he could help 
She waited for three hours before the doctor reappeared. The angry lady 
demanded, "What took you so long?" 
He smiled and then told her, "Well, I had to get permits from the
Environmental Protection Agency, the Forest Service, and the Bureau of Land
Management before I could remove old-growth timber from a recreational area
and I am sorry, but they all turned me down."
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Cogito ergo spud (I think therefore I yam).
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